Business:
Daniel went to San Fransisco last weekend with Genpo Roshi. Daniel is going to use some of the psychological/Gestalt techniques with our group.
Sign up for poster placements around town to get the word out about our retreat.

We have a multiplicity of selves.
In the Tibetan tradition they use a lot of visualization, . Koan study is the same thing: you become something. Often parts of ourselves that are lost or denied are parts that we need, i.e. competition: if you say, "I don't think competition is good," then that is not the truth. What you really mean is "I don't like that part of myself. I don't want to see that part of myself." Then a part becomes disowned. When you suppress a part of yourself it often just comes out even more--just unconsciously.You don't "not be" something by making believe that it doesn't exist. To deny what you are denies your humanity, your being.

The Tibetan Bardo system is read to a person when they are dying on how to reincarnate. Point is to make them conscious. You can't do this by denying what is real. We need to speak from this space instead of about that space.
This is contemporary practice. We can't practice the way we used to because we don't live the way we used to.

Question: "I instantly go to the 'I'm wrong' spot of inner considering."
Response: In life, when you want what you want, you have to confront. It's the price that you pay to be able to do what you want. Effort.
It's convenient to think that you're wrong because then you can avoid confrontation. So maybe you are hiding instead.

Discussion about the Hell Realm:
The Hell Realm is a place of constant battle. When you are in the Hell Realm you are arguing, irritated (inside or outside), feeling put upon, feeling like you have to protect yourself because others will insult you. When we are in the Hell Realm we think that we have a lack of power, but if you are one with the emotions and just stop thinking, justifying, etc., you just feel new power.

We then practiced being one with the Hell Realm:
"When I am one with the Hell Realm, I feel very alert, very powerful and expectant, but not like I have to do anything in particular; I can do what I want."
"It's layered. Now I feel calm and strong."
This is an energy that can burst through anything.

Samsara is delusion. The Hell Realm is a delusion. The delusion is that the thing that's keeping us from being powerful is others. The reason we don't have power is that we are dis-empowering ourselves. We feel that others have the power. What a strange truth that we are afraid to empower ourselves. Own your own power. Hell Realm is a way of disowning our own powers. What's common is that we feel impotent. We can't get what we want or get others to be we want. Hell Realm implies unconscious anger. A sense of being safer at a distance.

If we are avoiding the basic energy of the Hell Realm, then we are probably afraid of it. We need the energy, what we do with it is something else.

Practice being one with the Hell Realm again:
"Without feeding it a lot of thought, it goes away a bit." Thoughts fuel fear; without thoughts it's not even there.
"Without thoughts it felt like a powerful energy." When you become close to these feelings it's just energy. 

Many people are invested in thinking that everything is everyone's fault. This is just a habit. Sit feeling empowered. It's all up to you.
